If you haven’t already deduced this, I am one hundred and ten percent a scatter-brain. I have a job where knowing everything going on is important, and a large part of that is organizing it all at once. But any of the staff I work with will tell you I have to do things one step at a time, otherwise the though will be gone forever. If I have a thought, or something that needs done, I either write it down or do it right away. Which isn’t always the most effective way to go about things, but sometimes when its too hectic you just have to do something, anything.
Picture me: cell on my ear, running from room to room never quite remembering the original purpose of each visit, but starting a new idea each time I enter. It is only once I put the phone down check my list and do one thing at a time that the original thing gets accomplished.
Being focused and present in everyday life is something I struggle with. Hence why I am trying to correct it this year. It could be the addiction to my phone and social media, or it could be the line of work I chose that creates this need to do it all at once, but in all honesty, I got it from my mama.
Running a house hold, getting all the littles to their sporting events, getting my dad to hockey practices and games, planning tournaments and barbeques, all while still working, having a social life and planning vacations for the family, my mom really did it all. What she taught me through all that is that its possible. It is possible to do it all and if you have a plan and focus on it you can accomplish it. If memory serves me correctly, she had about 17 planners, 3 calendars and a list at all times ( I know that is a bit hyperbolic, but its all for effect). I have now adopted this behavior and it has really gotten me to where I am, so thanks Mom. Writing everything down for the day helps me focus on that list only, until it is completed. Once it is done I can create the next list that has to be done, so on and so on until its time for bed. So this is what is helping me with the focus part of my resolution. Planning each step and doing things one at a time throughout the day has made a big difference in the past few months.
Being present is also something I have learned from my mom over time. She never asked for the photo of herself on vacation, or checked her email or phone in front of us kids. Instead she took time to really connect with every person in the family and ensure that they had a photo or a memory to attach to the good feeling they were experiencing. She was present. She was always listening and interacting without distraction. This is what I am working towards. I want to carve out time to connect, focus on what is happening in each moment, and savor it maybe capture it for someone else. Just Be present.
Being present always sounded like a load of hooey growing up..
” of course I am present, I am here.. duh”
But being present doesn’t only mean body, it means mind and soul, and I am working towards this connection with my friends, my family and the interactions I am a part of. I may have a to-do list constantly running through my head but at the top of my list is to live a happy and fulfilling life. Spending time with my boyfriend and learning a skill he has to bond closer, spending the day shopping and listening to my friend vent about the struggles she faces, sleeping on the couch with dog just to feel close, calling your mom just to hear about the weather. All of these things do not require a to-do list or a photo-op they just require the want. I am working towards making that a priority in my life. Shutting down the phone, turning off the music, silence is key in my life. Maybe not real silence, but the drowning out of the to-do’s so I can focus on what I am actually doing each day. This is how I plan to be present.
This is a very round-about way of getting to the point, but all I am after is strong connections, focusing on priorities at hand, making sure I am present in my relationships and continuing to create memories rather than constructing them for Instagram. Being present doesn’t mean never taking photo’s it means capturing moments for others while they are not. It means deciding which photo is the right one to take from your holiday instead of spending the entire time behind a lens. Making the decision to just enjoy your time how ever you see fit and really enjoy it. That’s what I am working towards and so far its going well.
**Thanks Mom for always taking the picture and never being in them, you have taught me that you hold those moments of us laughing and singing in your memory and your heart, where I may only have the photo. The only reason I have that photo is because you were selfless enough to ensure I was able to have something to look back on. You were present, and you captured the moments rather than insisting to be a part of them. I appreciate the time you took to be present in my life and in our families life, the time you took to create meaningful conversation every chance you could. I still remember many car conversation and meaningful mom-daughter moments over fast food in between games. I strive to do the same for my kids one day. You were focused and present and I never witnessed you checking your screen. You are present and I appreciate that.
P.s. I know shes happy crying right now, so send her a hug, she deserves it. xo